What are basic emotional needs?
Schema-therapy usually distinguish five categories of basic emotional needs of a person, some are especially important in childhood (Young, Klosko, & Weishaar, 2006):
1. Attachment and security: it is important for us to have a close emotional connection with others, which allows us to feel security, stability, attention, love and acceptance of others. It is important for a child to be under the care of a reliable adult who cares for him and provides a safe environment for life, growth and development.
2. Independence, competence and identity: we need an awareness of what makes us who we are and what we do well. Children must have a safe and secure environment from which to explore and learn about the world. The ultimate goal of ripening to adulthood is to eventually be able to learn to stand firmly on your feet. Parents (or those involved in the child) need to slowly but surely allow children to separate from them so that they become autonomous adults. Children need adequate self-perception, self-esteem. In order to develop a strong sense of identity, they need to be assessed who they are, like people, and what they are capable of doing.
3. Freedom to express, express their important needs and feelings. Children need to feel that they are emotionally connected with other people, and can share their experiences, thoughts, and feelings with others.
4. Spontaneity, fun and play. For the child, the possibility of spontaneous expression of thoughts and feelings is important for their study and understanding, without being under strict or suppressive rules.
5. Realistic boundaries, self-discipline and self-control: it is especially important that children know their boundaries and accept reasonable limits set by others. In order to live in a society with others, it is useful for children to learn certain rules. It is important for children to understand that sometimes there is a need to subordinate their autonomy or self-expression when communicating with others and to be able to do it. It is very important for children to learn healthy ways to endure and fight frustration.
Satisfying basic emotional needs is important not only in childhood, but also in adulthood. It makes us happy, allows us to live a full life and enjoy it.
What happens when in childhood the basic emotional needs are not satisfied, and what to do with the consequences of this - see the link.
Based on schematherapylondon.org